What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
15.06.2025 08:46
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
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I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
What is the best way to keep my vagina clean and fresh?
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
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I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
What is the difference between the terms "Millennials" and "kids"?
Im dying but, im not bitter.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
It was going to be , some day.
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
So whats the point in blame.
Why do Democrats never produce a good argument for why Trump was a bad president?
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
Why do most Indian women cuckold or cheat on their husbands?
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
She found it foreign!.
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
What is the funniest joke you've been told that you still think about to this day?
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
Where the ultimate outsiders.
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
Why do almost all the girls on Quora look beautiful?
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
What makes you feel guilty the most?
They are buried together, in the same grave..
All the time i was locked up.
But it wasn’t much.
What is the sluttiest thing your wife has ever done?
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
Im still living with it.
Comes on , in middle age.
How do I identify fake friends in life?
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
(And it was in our own minds.)
On the 31st of Jan this month .
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
He resisted the act ,that day.
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
We were not on the streets..
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
Why did i forgive my father ?
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
I know ,a lot about trauma.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
My mum and dad in the seventies!
I said to her
I don,t even have a pension.
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
I waited trembling.
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
He knew the spot.
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
What did i know ?
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
The only rule us 5 kids had .
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
She was in good health!
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
Ive learnt so much.
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
I did it because my mum asked me too!
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
I have no regrets .
He was dying to do it , i knew.
Would this be the day?
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
I think the readers, may guess!
When she asked me how she looked .
Was to survive, this bastard.
One cannot live in the past .
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
She wouldn,t have been !
But ive been too sick for many years..
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
We all went to grammer schools
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
I write beautiful poetry .
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
My family never makes their pension either.
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
But, we were locked up after school.
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
Especially a lifetime of it.
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
I couldn’t, believe it.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
This is soul school!.
I was seconnd youngest,
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
I could never make a relationship work though!
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
I was very sick at this time too.
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
I will be 64.
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
This is how, and why children get BPD.
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
My life is so biszare .
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
And who doesn’t know suffering?
And i lived it daily.
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
I never cut or harmed myself..
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
I had hoped to write a book about this .
I was 9 years of age.
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
I was scared of men, in general
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
Who then, do I blame.?
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
She married twice! .
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
Put me off passion for life!!
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
As i do to all so called friends.?
So, i spoilt her more .
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
She loved him until the end.
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.